Because, most important of all – they play to relax.
Listen to music for joy – not as homework.
Different genres and styles – it makes them receptive to new cultures and ideas.
They go to the piano on days they feel lonely,
Or when they need an escape when there’s too much company.
On days that are busy, it’s a minute at night.
Because playing the piano just makes them feel light.
More skilled at managing their schedule than most of their peers,
They develop these skills over time – learn to balance practise with study as well as work.
They practise daily through rain, or through hail or through sun,
Because they love the challenge of practise – they think it’s real fun.
Practise more when it’s busy, and on days they feel taxed,
Because, most important of all – they play to relax.
It’s odd to see so many students giving up hobbies during years when work or study get challenging. And see long term piano students practising more during these times.
I write this poem as a piano teacher who teaches her students how to schedule, so that they practise daily, and their daily piano practise is relaxed.
I’m a Roman Catholic living in a multi-faith family and I often call myself a Roaming Catholic, because I borrow from all faiths when I see something good that helps me.
Because small bits of practise will make smooth out of rough.
Later it’s SEP ‘cos you’ll pick it apart,
Exploring aurals and technique till it gets in your heart.
Because music with meaning is what will bring joy,
And analysis and theory will become a new toy.
A tool to help you experiment,
With a little bit of improv – time well spent.
So let your practise have meaning and learn all the tools
That I teach you in class, it’ll help you with school.
To study much quicker – more independently,
And family support will help you keep your hobby permanently.
Practise and learn, have a hobby for life,
It will help you later in times of strife.
You’ll go to your piano and play out your struggles,
Till you feel you can go back relaxed and untroubled.
TOG & SEP are my short-forms for playing hands together and hands separately. Sight-reading means playing a new piano piece that you don’t know after a glance at it.
Menopause is the hormonal change that women face when their bodies are no longer able to bear children.
It’s a time when many women face drastic changes in their energy levels and need rest, in order to bounce back.
My post talks of the need to open up a discussion on these issues.
The video below was taken at a poetry session I participated in, where I talk about cultural issues that can deprive women of rest and support, from their husbands and families, at this time when they so desperately need it.
The end of my post has links to support sites for menopause and surgical menopause.
Let’s talk about this topic so that there’s knowledge and awareness. Let us let menopause do what it’s supposed to. Relieve women of that monthly discomfort/ tiredness/pain and let their bodies build up the strength and stamina they will need to build strong bones despite the lower levels of estrogen that accompany this phase.
Let us let menopause lead women to freedom.
Menopause – the thing we don’t talk about here in India
Menopause is a secret.
Many women don’t know much about it until it hits them.
And the busy of today often leaves families ill prepared to support the woman who has always been THEIR support system.
Women here in India don’t talk openly about issues relating to menopause, and many seem to have forgotten the simple life-style changes that are needed to make this time a journey to freedom.
For some families, a visit to the gynaecologist is considered a “woman’s issue” and men don’t get involved. And this often deprives women of support from their husbands or partners, something they desperately need at this stage in their lives.
Many Indian women just don’t know enough about menopause, to know when they need to visit a doctor. To know that it’s important to have a doctor who has both the qualifications and the experience with helping women through this stage of life.
Older women who have not been able to help themselves often freeze and change the subject when younger women try to talk to them.
I’m talking about this because I think opening up this subject is the only way to help women who are struggling. And help them know that it doesn’t need to be this way.
Here’s some poetry relating to cultural ideas that affect the quality of family support for menopausal women
Surgical menopause
This is menopause as a result of removal of the ovaries. It’s a more sudden menopause than the natural one, where ovaries gradually slow down the production of oestrogen. I don’t want to talk about this in detail, because I’m not qualified to answer questions.
Instead, look at the websites below, if you need more support than your get from you surgeon or doctor. Both have online support groups for surgical menopause, as well as menopause in general.
Please use these sites wisely and always approach medical issues with the guidance and treatment of a qualified doctor.
Coping with Hot Flashes
A lot of women who read this post spoke about how they’re struggling with hot flashes, so I’ve added this section.
Tips to make hot flashes easier to live with :
Drink enough water.
Probiotics help with a lot of post menopausal issues. Chass, an Indian remedy for coping with very hot weather, also helps with hot flashes. It’s a mixture of homemade/probiotic dahi or curds with water – you could add a pinch of salt, fresh ginger paste, coriander or mint leaves and chia or basil seeds if you wish, or just have it plain. Another is apple cider vinegar – it’s nice as a salad dressing. Lots of recipes online if you search.
Wear clothing that’s cool and allows the body to breathe. Cotton, linen or mull fabrics are nice. A new fabric that combines flax and cotton is pretty cool too. Check out labels if you can’t judge fabric by look and feel, because many cotton fabrics have elastane and lycra blends which aren’t as cool to wear.
Eat vegetables and fruit daily.
Walk for at least 30 minutes daily. Exercise – walking in particular – will in the long run reduce the level of discomfort you feel when you have a hot flash. I believe that exercise improves the bodies internal ‘thermostat’ – whatever that mechanism is :-).
The small additions to your diet mentioned above, combined with exercise and cool clothing are likely to reduce your hot flashes, and bring down the level of discomfort you feel with them.
Stress, and your ability to cope with your daily life will impact your ability to exercise in the phase when menopause begins. Family support and understanding, as well as your attitude to accepting help and teaching your family to help you, will impact your ability to exercise and look after yourself.
It’s so important for every woman to know that she has the power to shape her environment so it works to support her when she needs it to.
Lets be more educated about menopause and lead the way to change.
Don’t get up and leave them to wash up the plates.
They’re on their feet before every meal,
Cooking and washing and keeping the home clean.
They won’t cook once daily ‘cos you want your meals fresh,
And I think you know that they really need some rest.
Women-Oh-Pause, just stop and think.
Are busy lifestyles driving you to the brink?
Long working hours, then a fancy vacation,
When you all need to work less, and can have a nice lazy stay-cation.
Men, do some housework. It will keep you fit,
And your blood sugar levels might even come down a bit.
Women slow down before you get older,
Set routines that help family have time together.
People make time, slow down the pace,
So you have memories that will put a smile on your face.
Because the busy of today, along with rigid gender roles, often lets women down at times in their lives when they most need support. Yes, one of these times is menopause.
The lines up to really need some rest, are a reference to rigid gender roles, fixed ideas on cooking, and patriarchy. These thoughts also apply to anyone who doesn’t help with chores, or is rigid about fresh food to the extent that the home manager gets no rest.
The rest of the poem is not gender specific and applies to all. I wanted both men and women to be a part of it and I wanted to mention women because I’ve specifically mentioned men. So I’ve added them alternating gender and then followed with ‘people’.
